arcanarumlogs | Waking up cought in a dream

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domon kasshu

Waking up cought in a dream

Who: Domon Kasshu and his housemates.
What: Domon wakes up after sleeping for several days as a result of his forced transformation into the werewolf.
When: Late afternoon on November 4th
Where: His house in the Rose district.
Warnings: Angst. Possibly some mild language. Actually Kaine will be in this so make that lots of not-so-mild language.

Domon awoke groggy and disoriented. A side affect of transforming into the werewolf that he was becoming much too familiar with. He stayed still long enough to collect his thoughts. But when the wolf's memories came back, he wished he'd been allowed to forget for once.

He sat bolt upright in his bed, breathing heavily. His worst fears had come true. He'd hurt people. The Rulers had forced him to turn into that thing and he'd hurt people. He'd injured a kid he'd promised to protect and killed another that had been kind to him...

It made him feel sick. He tried to get out of bed but lost his balance, catching himself on his bedside table and making it rattle loudly. He was obviously in shock. The wolf-traits that had been mostly immobile up until now were suddenly betraying his mental state, ears folded tight against his skull and tail fur fluffed. He brought his left hand up and just... stared at it like he expected to grow claws again at any moment.

If any of his housemates heard the noise and decide to come check on him, that's likely the state they'll find him in.

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When he heard the clatter, Sai Saici instantly tensed up. That... that hadn't come from Domon's room, had it? Was it some scary creature like the Rulers had turned Domon into?

Hesitantly, he grabbed the broom he'd been using to sweep the floor that morning, and quickly opened the door, charging in ready to attack--

"Hyaaaaaa-!"

But when he realized just what it was that was walking around, he seemed surprised, but thrilled. The broom clattered to the floor as he rushed in for a hug, pulling his friend tightly to him.

"Domon! Oh, thank goodness you're OK! You had me worried, sleeping in like that for days!" No, no he wasn't crying. Definitely not crying.

In her own way, Kainé was used to monsters. The Shadowlord, Hook, Tyrann, Emil and herself, the rest of the army of Shades... Death and sorrow stalked the world she had come from. Fighting with her fists was a bitch, though. No magic, no swords... What the fuck was wrong with this shitty-ass world?

Musings on the state of the island aside, the noise that echoed through the thin walls was enough to snap her attention outwards. Back at home, stray noises were mostly a sign of Shades... or rocks. That training was too deeply ingrained to dismiss. Her body tensed and she set the seeds of the flower she had been failing at crossbreeding on the nearby sofa - her one real indulgence in regards to comfort.

Her body had made the decision before her mind had come to it and she didn't even think before throwing open the door and striding into the hallway.

The room it had come from was Domon's. That was bad. Either the kid was transforming - kid? He was older than her! - or something was in there with him. She wouldn't put it past the Rulers to have more monsters out to prey on them. The problem was her lack of weaponry.

She braced herself outside of the door, too keyed up to go find weapons. If something was menacing the guy, the least she could do was to fight it off while he was asleep.

It would help her work off some steam at least. She was getting antsy for a fight. But when she flung open the door it was not to find a monster but a scared puppy.

There was no other way to describe him. Domon's body was tense, his eyes fixated on the hand in front of him. She stared at him in silence for a moment before stepping closer, her movements oddly graceful for once.

From what she'd seen of him, Domon was more hotheaded than Emil. Did that make him more easily broken, or less? There was only one way to find out. Kainé leant down to where he stooped against the beside table. "Domon?" she asked slowly.

He whipped around and stared blankly when the door opened, like a deer caught in headlights. So he didn't move even as Sai practically tackled him. It took a moment for his mind to stop reeling enough to make sense of what was going on.

"Sai Saici..." He placed a hand on his friend's shoulder, trying to comfort him even though he couldn't even comfort himself right now. His fur started to smooth out again but his ears and tail drooped more, beginning to show sadness instead of shock.

"I... how long was I asleep?"

It didn't take anytime for Sora to run to Domon's room and throw open the door. Because honestly, screw knocking her friend is in trouble! She thinks.

"Domon-san?!"

Oh god he was awake now...so now what?

Domon heard the door open but didn't bother to look up at first. He recognized her voice but to be honest he didn't want to see her right now. She was unpredictable, and he had no idea if she would be understanding of his affliction or blame him for the lives he took.

He was not broken, but he was bent so far a few accusing words might finally make him snap.

"Don't worry. I'm in control right now." The words lacked the confidence behind them to be reassuring, but he tried.

"...Sora?"

He stared back at her, but didn't do anything else. What if she was scared of him now? What if he did something to make it worse?

Edited 2012-09-12 04:14 (UTC)

Her lips tensed at those words. She moved without thinking, a hand reaching out to try to snatch at his collar, tug him up so she could look at him properly.

Her anger faded. It was like looking in a mirror. For just a moment her left arm twinged, though she knew it couldn't. Her arm was human. Somehow that made it even worse. For a moment more she stayed silent before letting him go. Dropping down to his level, the better to be unheard by others, she spoke.

"Listen," she said, quietly. "I know what it's like to have a monster inside of you."

Domon wasn't wearing a shirt right now -- the transformation had ripped the majority of what he was wearing to shreds and he hadn't collected himself enough yet to think to put on a fresh outfit -- but he hadn't managed to untangle himself from the blankets before collapsing, so those will serve the same purpose.

It only took the slightest tug to get him to whip around and bring his arm up defensively. Was she attacking him!? He wouldn't blame her if she did...

But then she knelt down by him, and he slowly dropped his guard again. He stared at her dully for a moment, like he was having trouble understanding her. "What do you mean?"

"Back at home..." she began, hesitating. Then, slowly, she sighed. "There were these... monsters. We called them Shades, thinking they were mindless beasts. They kept attacking everyone, everywhere, and since our world was pretty much destroyed even before that, things just went to shit. There's only a few villages left where I was."

Drawing her hand back, certain he was paying attention now, she rested it on her left arm. "I grew up in a shithole called 'the Aerie'. It was isolated from the rest of the world because they couldn't trust anyone. Anyone different was dangerous, or wrong. Something to be feared and hated. So I wasn't welcome there. Nobody else wanted to keep a thing like me, so my grandma took me in. We set up home just outside of it, this little hut for the two of us. Then one day, a gigantic Shade attacked. My grandma was killed. I thought I was gonna die. Then I heard this voice in my head."

A deep breath. Not long enough to allow him to speak, no. She wanted to get this story out while she felt she had to.

"It was a Shade. A cruel one, who didn't give a damn about anyone but himself. An' he saved me... in return for taking my body. He only let me stay in control while I was vengeful and vicious. Bastard loved hatred and misery. We were sharing the body for a damn long time with the understanding that if I died, he'd get to take over. Or if I got soft. Or got injured enough. And he'd do it, too. I'd been alone for so long I didn't care at first. I just wanted revenge on that shitball Shade. And then... I found people I cared about, and I nearly killed them. The only goddamn people in the world I cared about. I wanted to die all over again. I made them promise that if I ever got out of control, they'd kill me. But they begged me not to leave. They promised to kick his goddamn crazy ass if he came out again. As many times as it took."

She grinned lightly, just a little and shifted to lean against the bed beside him, head tilted back against the side of it. It was a long speech for her, and one she wasn't comfortable making, not really. "I can't see any benefits to your 'condition', but if you need someone to kick your ass away from others when that happens, just let me know."

Nope, instead she launches herself at him, giving him a big hug.

Sai knew it was no time for his usual jokes. Just the forlorn look on Domon's face was enough to get him to treat this matter seriously.

"Well... after you turned into a... w-well, that thing... I lost sight of you. And then you were back here, and I guess... a few days? I'm not sure."

There wasn't much he could tell Domon, sadly. He'd been hiding to stay away from both the wolves, despite how much he wanted to help Domon. He knew it was cowardly, but there was no way that he would have been able to stand up to Domon, and he knew that even more strongly.

Domon listened to her story quietly. At first he didn't believe her when she said she understood, but then she described her. And that was exactly what he was so paralyzed by right now. He'd hurt people he cared about, and he had no idea when that might happen again.

It was at least enough to get him to calm down a bit, to get him thinking again. He couldn't let himself fall apart now. If she could deal with this, then the King of Hearts definitely could. ...Right?

"Thank you. I don't think you could beat that thing, but maybe you can distract it-" No, he couldn't keep talking about it like it was completely separate from him. He had those memories, he had to take responsibility for them. It was the only way he'd ever be able to cope with those memories. "...Maybe you can distract me long enough to help whoever I'm attacking to get to safety. Then get inside of the nearest building until I go away. I... that thing I turn into won't follow you inside."

As he talked he'd been looking down, but now he looks back up again. He needed to look her in the eyes while he asked this. "Do you remember what that thing did while he had control of your body? Or did you black out?"

"...I remember everything," she answered, her voice low. She wanted to look away more than anything in the world right then. Her reputation was already going downhill from this, and her eyes were too expressive for her own liking. "My body changed, when he was in control. It was like being one of them. All I could do was sit there and watch while he acted like a goddamn animal trying to tear them apart. Couldn't fight him. Couldn't do jack shit to keep him controlled."

She shrugged lightly, hiding the misery of that moment in the way she knew best. She could still practically hear Emil's pleas. "Anyway, I'll distract you, don't worry about that. I may not look it, but I'm fast." she finished.

He just stands there for a moment, unmoving. Then he returns her hug, although it's a bit hesitant at first. But finally he gives her a real hug, if a bit too strong of one. He does not cry, but he does give a single choked sob.

She didn't care if it was strong or not, the important thing was that he was awake and hopefully ok. At least physically anyway.

"I'm so sorry."

"A few days?" He moved back over to the bed and have sat, half fell on it. "At least it wasn't weeks this time."

Cowardly? Maybe, but better than reckless courage. "Thank you."

"Then you really do know what it's like. When I'm that thing, I don't remember being me. But when I wake up as myself again I can remember everything that happened while I was transformed..." He closed his eyes tightly, and his mouth tightened to a thin line as his stomach heaved. Having memories of tearing someone's throat open with your teeth was not a pleasant experience.

But he was able to recompose himself, and give her a sad smile. "Thank you."

Physically he was fine. A few cuts, some bruises, but nothing worse than what he usually woke up with after becoming the werewolf.

Mentally, however, he was much worse of than he'd previously been.

"Why are you sorry? You're not the one who... who hurt people."

"But it wasn't you! It was them who did it, not you!"

This was one thing she was absolutely sure of. Sora knew by now the influence these Rulers had on everyone that was taken here. While she didn't know how much the whole event had influenced the gundam pilot, the one thing the acrobat knew was that she wanted to be there for him.

She wasn't a fighter nor did she want to be one but that didn't mean she wanted to see Domon or anyone else suffer.

Sai Saici nodded, remained silent. Then he went to sit on the bed next to Domon, cross-legged, and remained quiet a few moments more. He wasn't sure what else he could do, but seeing Domon this sad...

"Hey, Domon?" He finally asked, eyes tilting down to his idle hands in his lap. "Does this... happen a lot?"

"But it was still my body." Even if he wasn't 'awake' at the time. Domon wasn't sure if it was a blessing or a curse that he woke up with the wolf's memories every time.

It didn't matter that Sai Saici wasn't saying much. It helped just to have a friend by him right now.

Domon didn't make eye contact while he spoke, but was starting to sound a bit more like his usual self. "Every full moon. This is the second time the Rulers have triggered the transformation, but it's the first time they've sent out another wolf to have any kind of control over me."

"That doesn't matter to me! I know the truth and you could never do anything like that!"

In her mind, if someone wanted to do something like hurt people in both mind and body then she would have a problem. If they were being controlled and they didn't want to do those things then to her, it's not their fault. Call it being naive but that's who Sora was.

That little fact made Sai Saici shiver. He wasn't good with anything supernatural, if the journey through the Egyptian desert was enough evidence. But this was worse than that - this didn't have any explanation. At least at home they could blame the DG Cells.

"So there was another wolf? And this... this sorta thing happens all the time, huh." He wasn't sure how to respond to that, other than silence. But, he tried anyway. "I'm just glad you're okay, bro."

"I used to think that. Now I'm not so sure..."

After all, his master had done many things Domon wouldn't have thought him capable of. What if he was capable of doing unspeakable things as well, and the wolf just let that side of him out?

Domon winced when he saw Sai Saici shiver like that. Now one of his best friends was going to be terrified of him. He knew the problems Sai had with dealing with supernatural things, and now he qualified as that.

"Yeah. They did something else to me this time. Something that made me follow its orders."

He didn't respond to the last bit. As far as he was concerned, he shouldn't be okay. He should have been the one hurt, not his friends.

Sai Saici noted Domon's tone, and frowned, nudging Domon in the ribs with his elbow. This wasn't like Domon, not at all. He hadn't even seen him this defeated, even over Rain, and that was the part that was freaking him out the most about this whole thing.

"Hey, bro, snap out of it. You're acting weird."

Domon snaps back at him, frustration finally coming to the surface.

"How am I supposed to act!? I hurt one of my friends and killed someone that had gone out of their way to help me!"

"But that wasn't you. Just like it wasn't me when I attacked you when we had been infected with DG cells - it. Wasn't. Me."

He scooted a little closer to Domon, the hand that was missing its Shuffle Crest resting over Domon's, squeezing it a little. "And you're never going to convince me that you willingly killed someone you cared about. You're not that kind of guy, bro."

He whipped around, mouth open to say something else. But he stopped himself, closing his mouth again with a sigh. He was so incredibly upset and frustrated by the situation but he was just too exhausted for the anger that would normally cause.

"But you don't remember much of when you were infected with DG Cells, right?" He looked down, practically staring a whole into the floor. "When I change back I can remember everything. I remember them bagging me to snap out of it before I ripped them apart." He shuddered slightly. "I can't just... pretend like none of that happened."

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Waking up cought in a dream

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not so mild language /snerk

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Re: not so mild language /snerk

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